Breastfeeding in public – what’s all the fuss about?

Breast milk is the healthiest and best food a woman can provide for her baby. It transmits everything that is needed for proper development. A several-week-old baby is fed on demand. In practice, this means that it eats at different times of the day. It doesn’t matter if you are just at the store, at home or at a friend’s house. It will not wait. In this situation, you should take out the boob and just feed them.  

So what is all the fuss about? Because in practice, breastfeeding in public is still a taboo subject, and mothers are suspected of deliberately “knocking out their breasts.”

Breast milk is the best possible food a woman can provide for her baby. Although manufacturers of modified milk are doubling and tripling, modeling just on it – they will probably never be able to achieve the kind of results that are obtained by breastfeeding a child.  

Breastfeeding Is already formed between 16 and 22 weeks of pregnancy . Dzięki temu każda mama może przystawiać do piersi noworodka już od pierwszych chwil jego życia poza łonem. W ciągu pierwszych dni po narodzinach znajduje się w piersiach tak zwana siara. Jest to gęsty płyn o żółtej barwie, którego jest niewiele, aczkolwiek na tyle wystarczająco, aby wykarmić dziecko. To jest właśnie kluczowy moment, kiedy powinno się przystawić dziecko do piersi. Wówczas w mleku znajdują się wszystkie najpotrzebniejsze składniki: immunoglobulina, leukocyty i beta-karoten. Wszystko to sprawia, że dziecko zyskuje naturalną odporność i może się bronić przed drobnoustrojami poza łonem matki.  

Over time, breast milk changes its color and composition. It adapts to the particular stage in the child’s life, and thus provides him with everything he just happens to need: vitamins, fat or lactose. 

During breastfeeding, a unique bond is formed between mother and child. For a baby who is just getting to know the world, this is the first (and often the most important) relationship in life. At that time, the infant feels the warmth, smell and heartbeat of the mother, which makes him feel safe. This calms them down and allows them to fall asleep peacefully. Attaching the baby to the breast is especially helpful during illness, the duration of developmental leaps or the eruption of teeth. The bond formed during this time has an impact on the entire later life of the child and its developmental stages.  

While breastfeeding, the baby feels noticed. He knows that at that moment all attention is focused only on him. This is also when his senses develop: touch, smell and taste.  

During the first year of life, the baby is fed on demand, that is, when he is hungry. This means that he eats whenever he feels like it. As he doesn’t yet know how to show emotion other than by crying, he basically does just that. If it is hungry, it also starts crying. It’s too small for it to understand that it needs to wait until its mother comes home to calmly attach it to the breast. So if it’s feeding time just when he’s in a restaurant, on a walk in the park, at a museum or shopping, what should he do then? Where to go out? In such a situation, she takes a relatively comfortable position and feeds the baby.

Not everyone likes it. Voices of indignation are still heard on Internet forums. Texts aboutwomen specifically flaunting their “breasts” are the order of the day. On one of them you can read comments like this: “I don’t mind if a woman breastfeeds in public, but just like the majority writes that she should cover up a bit, because, willy-nilly, out of the corner of your eye you see it and sometimes someone may feel embarrassed. I personally would be ashamed.”

However, it is important to remember that both breastfeeding and eating are perfectly natural. If an adult can eat when they feel like it, why can’t a baby?

It is often said that a woman should hide in the restroom while nursing. I guess everyone knows what restrooms in public places usually look like. They smell bad, are neglected and cramped. So why should she hide in it?

However, in addition to mothers, our society also consists of millions of other people. These are men, children, the elderly and women who do not have or do not want children. In a way, they are forced to see women breastfeeding in public. They then see naked breasts and nipples. They think they can do it more discreetly, hide in some secluded place or express milk before leaving the house. There are even claims that this is a reason for scolding. Not everyone feels like watching the moment of breastfeeding in a restaurant while having lunch with friends or going to the pool with the family.  

For a very long time, voices for and against have been resounding on the Internet and beyond. And while no one doubts that breast milk is the best and essential for a baby, not everyone likes the idea of “publicly pulling out udders,” as you can read on one online forum. What’s more, often these voices also come from other mothers. They, too, believe that there are other ways to feed the baby. On the other side of the barricade is, among others, Agnieszka Wlodarczyk, who wrote under one of her instagram posts, “No restaurant we haven’t visited yet, because I would probably panic if he started crying loudly – and he can give a good laugh. Well, and I wouldn’t get slack with feeding in a public place… I am, however, of those who would prefer to do it without the stares of random people.”  

Besides, mothers are often accused of deliberate exhibitionism. Naked breasts are inferior to some, while others even excite them. So is the moment of feeding a necessity or intentional nakedness? We asked a newly minted mother, Zosia Zborowska-Wrona, to comment on the matter: “I think that in the 21st century, the image of a mother feeding in public should not offend or outrage anyone, and if someone has a problem with it then they should ask themselves why they are sexualizing something that has allowed our species to survive since the dawn of time.”  

All these voices of outrage are due to the still insufficient education on the subject. Many people, especially those who do not have children at all, do not understand how the mechanism of mother and child works. They don’t realize that children, especially the youngest ones, can’t wait. This is not an idealized picture, because most mothers, if they could, would also prefer to feed their child in a quiet, home environment. For breastfeeding women, this is neither physically nor mentally comfortable. The awkward position puts a strain on her spine, which is already heavily used since her pregnancy. Also mentally it is not comfortable for her to pour milk on her favorite dress while people around her look with disdain and comment on the fact that she is feeding in public. This is not exhibitionism, as some people think “I don’t understand it either – breasts as an erotic decoy and object of sexual pursuits are ok, but as a method of feeding – disgusting. The world has gone crazy…” – the online discussion continues.  

A special hashtag #NormalizingBreastfeeding was even created to familiarize people with the topic. One of its advocates is Amy, a midwife with years of experience, whose account called The Breast Milk Queen is followed by more than 70,000 users. In Poland, we also have her counterpart, namely. Hafija – a breastfeeding mother. Agata, for that is her real name, runs an active account on Instagram and organizes special courses and trainings for moms-to-be. She is a certified Breastfeeding Promoter by training, and as a result, many women are eager to take advantage of her help.  

A special support group “Feeding Boobs to the Streets”. run by a therapist, Hanna Krawsz. The group brings together several thousand moms who need help on the topic of lactation. As it turns out, the problem stems precisely from inadequate education and even a lack of sympathetic staff in obstetrics and gynecology departments.  

Fortunately, more and more, well-known names from the front pages of newspapers are speaking out on the subject. Thanks to the power of social media, this is reaching farther and farther, thus raising awareness among people. One such woman is Aleksandra Żebrowska (wife of Michał Żebrowski, the editors remind us). She is a mother of three and is currently expecting her fourth child. On her Instagram, she speaks out about the importance of breastfeeding and is eager to share photos where she does just that. In January 2022, she even appeared on the cover of “High Heels” holding her son, whom she was breastfeeding, in her arms.  

Aleksandra Domanska is another famous mom. Known for her uncompromising nature, the actress even shared a photo of herself dressed in a suit while breastfeeding her baby during a public appearance. The caption “in the footsteps of animals I keep my puppy close to me” leaves no illusions about how important this is to her.  

The topic of feeding in public is also often taken up by actresses and dancers, Agnieszka Kaczorowska. On her social profiles you can find not only a wealth of knowledge and information on lactation, but also photos where she feeds her children. She herself writes “(…) it’s really very convenient that you have baby food with you at all times. It happens to me often to feed in the car, because we move a lot in connection with work, but also finishing our new house. I have no reluctance to feed in public places, so I decided to upload such a photo here as well. It’s nature. That’s what we’re made for .” 

In Poland, the topic is becoming more and more talked about. More and more social campaigns are being created, where others are being educated about how important it is. To this end, the National Health Program has prepared a campaign called “Mom’s milk has power,” where you can also find tips on breastfeeding in public. Also, companies are supporting women by creating special places for them where they can feed their baby freely or express milk.  

The other day there was a lot of buzz about the YES brand campaign. They released a commercial without any filters. There we can find, among others, an Olympic athlete, Katarzyna Zimann kissing her girlfriend, model Bogna Golec, who shows that a woman can be beautiful at any size, and the just-mentioned Aleksandra Żebrowska, who breastfeeds in a museum. This peculiar manifesto shows all shades of femininity.  

It’s not only Poles who continue to educate and familiarize themselves with the topic of public breastfeeding. The first week of August marks International Breastfeeding Week around the world. World Breastfeeding Day, on the other hand, falls on August 1 and was established by UNICEF back in 1990. Agnieszka Kaczorowska, mother of two daughters, also addresses the topic on her Instagram: “Each of us makes our own choices. There is a different story behind each of us. The topic of feeding is a touchy one, as I’ve been finding out here for more than two years…”

One country that still struggles with the problem of feeding in public is… the United States. Despite the fact that it is a highly developed and seemingly very tolerant country, it still happens that women are, among other things, asked out of restaurants or from stores. What ‘s more, a lot of US residents give up breastfeeding once the baby is 6 months old. This is because they are concerned about the appearance of their breasts.  

A country that is the complete opposite of the United States is Norway. Even before giving birth, special classes are held there for mothers-to-be, during which they are taught the importance of breast milk and how to feed. Parental leave itself lasts 42 weeks in Norway precisely so that the child can be breastfed for as long as possible. Doctors recommend doing this for a minimum of the first two years of a child’s life. Women breastfeeding can be found in many public places, from parks to cafes.  

Breastfeeding affects the development of the child and the bond produced between the child and the mother. Not only can a woman not be forbidden to feed her child in public, in fact Polish law protects women from such a situation. On December 3, 2010, the Law on Equal Treatment came into force. If anyone asks a woman to stop feeding in public, this violates the law and is a manifestation of gender discrimination.  

It will probably be many more years before the world understands the importance of breastfeeding itself and the fact that it sometimes has to be done in public is not due to the need for women to undress. GentleWoman’s editors quietly hope that this will happen as soon as possible.